Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Troy Hurtubise vs Bear Grylls

This will be the first new recurring segment that does not have Douche in its title: Phatality Phights. You know the often asked question of who would win in a fight between two notable persons? Well this is exactly that but with my added commentary.

Phirst ever Phatality Phight matchup: Troy Hurtubise vs Bear Grylls

Troy Hurtubise is probably the greatest inventor of all time. He has created firepaste (most resistant substance on Earth), 1313 paste (which can stop sniper rifle fire), the Angel Light and the Trojan Ballistic Armor Suit.

The Angel Light is a large device that can allow people to see through objects, detect stealth aircraft, see into flesh and will one day cure cancer.

However most important of all is the badass armor he makes. The Trojan Ballistic Armor Suit is like real life Halo armor, but better. The Ursus Mark VII armor suit he made he used to beat the crap of a bear that had attacked him years before.

Bear Grylls however is not a bear. Bear Grylls the man was born on the beaches of Normandy on June 6, 1944 but through his superb diet and exercise routine is currently only 34 years old.

Bear enjoys swimming in frozen lakes, sleeping in tonton carcasses and killing innocent animals on cable TV. His favorite food is the small intestine of a camel and his favorite past time is making tents out of leaves and saliva.

Bear is proficient in many weapons including, but not limited to: knives, boomerangs, sharp pointy sticks, jagged rocks, smooth rocks, trees, dead animals, and his socks.

Trust me, you do not want to find either of these people in a dark alley, for Troy may cure your cancer only to destroy you with his robot armor and Bear would have the entire place set with traps only to choke you to death with his bare hands.

Who would win?

8 comments:

Steve "Nub Pwnage" Kannenberg said...

bear grylls is a poser/douchebag/pussyman



tryo hurtubise for the win

EJR said...

I could've guessed that you would vote for him.

Phil said...

steve and bear grylls have something in comon, i just cant put my finger on it.

Steve "Nub Pwnage" Kannenberg said...

thats hilarious coming from maybe the second most insecure, weak, and douchebaggy person i know.



luke benjamin is number 1

EJR said...

Final Tally:

Troy Hurtubise: 13
Bear Grylls: 4

Troy Hurtubise wins!

Anonymous said...

[url=http://sunkomutors.net/][img]http://sunkomutors.net/img-add/euro2.jpg[/img][/url]
[b]nero linux, [url=http://sunkomutors.net/]buy adobe dreamweaver[/url]
[url=http://sunkomutors.net/][/url] coreldraw 9 download free virus software downloads
nero showtime [url=http://sunkomutors.net/]finance software for canada[/url] educators discount software
[url=http://sunkomutors.net/]order software products[/url] office 2003 activation
[url=http://sunkomutors.net/]photoshop software to buy[/url] sample software reseller
for selling a software [url=http://sunkomutors.net/]microsoft office 2003 crack[/b]

Anonymous said...

[url=http://murudobaros.net/][img]http://murudobaros.net/img-add/euro2.jpg[/img][/url]
[b]buying oem software, [url=http://murudobaros.net/]office 2007 enterprise romanian[/url]
[url=http://murudobaros.net/]education discount software[/url] autocad architecture software with student discount
buy adobe photoshop cs3 [url=http://murudobaros.net/]cheapest software anywhere reviews[/url] price list of softwares
[url=http://murudobaros.net/]want to buy photoshop[/url] linux software store
[url=http://murudobaros.net/]buy adobe acrobat software[/url] microsoft student software discounts
discount software for educators [url=http://murudobaros.net/]microsoft project management software[/b]

Anonymous said...

[url=http://bariossetos.net/][img]http://bariossetos.net/img-add/euro2.jpg[/img][/url]
[b]academic software vista, [url=http://bariossetos.net/]office 2003 network copy and paste hangs vista[/url]
[url=http://hopresovees.net/][/url] buy pc software in order book software
adobe photoshop + cs3 + free download + intel mac [url=http://vonmertoes.net/]software for a retail store[/url] old educational software
[url=http://vonmertoes.net/]adobe software support[/url] free autocad software
[url=http://bariossetos.net/]draw a sine wave in coreldraw[/url] xp oem software
good software to buy [url=http://bariossetos.net/]game software shop[/b]